The Life Saving Station

On a dangerous sea coast where shipwrecks often occur there was once a crude little life-saving station. The building was just a hut, and there was only one boat but the few devoted members kept a constant watch over the sea, and with no thought for themselves went out day and night tirelessly searching for the lost. Some of those who were saved and various others in the surrounding area wanted to become associated with the station and give of their time and money and effort for the support of its work. New boats were bought and new crews trained. The little life saving station grew.

Some of the members of the life-saving station were unhappy that the building was so crude and poorly equipped. They felt that a more comfortable place should be provided as the first refuge of those saved from the sea. They replaced the emergency cots with beds and put better furniture in the enlarged building. Now the life-saving station became a popular gathering place for its members, and they decorated it beautifully and furnished it exquisitely, because they used it as a sort of club. Fewer members were now interested in going to sea on life-saving missions, so they hired life-boat crews to do this work. The life-saving motif still prevailed in this club's decoration, and there was a liturgical life-boat in the room where the club initiations were held. About this time a large ship was wrecked off the coast, and the hired crews brought in boat loads of cold, wet and half-drowned people. They were dirty and sick and and they messed up the beautiful new clubhouse. The property committee soon met and had a shower house built outside the club where victims of shipwreck could be cleaned up before coming inside.

At the next meeting, there was a split in the club membership. Most of the members wanted to stop the club's life-saving activities as being unpleasant and a hindrance to the normal social life of the club. Some members insisted upon life-saving as their primary purpose and pointed out that they were still called a life-saving station. But there were finally voted down and told that if they wanted to save the lives of all the various kinds of people who were shipwrecked in those waters, they could begin their own life saving station down the coast. They did.

As the years went by, the new station experienced the same changes that had occurred in the old. It evolved into a club, and yet, another life-saving station was founded. History continued to repeat itself, and if you visit that sea coast today, you will find a number of exclusive clubs along that shore. Shipwrecks are frequent in those waters, but most of the people drown!

Taken from Right-On Ideas for Youth Groups by Wayne Rice and Mike Yaconelli

Perfect Father, not Reflection

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'God is not a reflection of our earthly fathers; He is the perfection of our earthly fathers.'

As a perfect Father, God would not dare give His children everything they ask for. He knows that many of things you think you want so badly are not good for you-- in fact, they are downright dangerous to your spiritual life! But because He is a perfect Father, you can always trust Him, even when He seems to act out of character or you don't understand what He's doing. You can be sure that he has your best interest at heart.




As long as you are trying to get something from God, you will have a difficult time surrendering your life to God.

Life 4 Christ in nickels and dimes...

Fred Craddock:

“To give my life for Christ appears glorious. To pour myself out for others—to pay the ultimate price of martyrdom—I’ll do it. I'm ready, Lord, to go out in a blaze of glory.
“We think that giving our all to the Lord is like taking a thousand dollar bill and laying it on the table. ‘Here's my life, Lord. I'm giving it all.’ But the reality for most of us is that he sends us to the bank and has us cash in the thousand dollars for quarters.
“We go through life putting out twenty-five cents here and fifty cents there. Listen to the neighbor kid's troubles instead of saying, ‘Get lost.’ Go to a committee meeting. Give a cup of water to a shaky old man in a nursing home. Usually giving our life to Christ isn't glorious. It's done in all those little acts of love, twenty-five cents at a time.
“It would be easy to go out in a flash of glory; it's harder to live the Christian life little by little over the long haul.”

Baseball as Pomo

In his book, “Time For Truth,” apologist Os Guinness helps explain postmodern thought by using an illustration of three baseball umpires discussing their various approaches to calling balls and strikes.

The first umpire represents traditional thought which accepts the concept of absolute truth. “There are balls and there are strikes,” he says, “and I call them the way they are.”

The second ump, representing modern philosophy with its subjective tendencies, denounces the first as arrogant and asserts, “There are balls and there are strikes and I call them the way I see them.”

The third umpire, who represents postmodern thought, dismisses the first two and declares, “There are balls and there are strikes, but they ain’t nothing until I call them.”

emotional-mechanic

Rick wandered to my blog and made friend with me over i12know blog. He had a lot of good stuff like this a new life emerging: How emotionally mature are you?...

Emotional maturity is directly linked to spiriutal maturity. How are you doing?

1. You accept criticism gratefully, being honestly glad for an
opportunity to improve.
2. You do not indulge in self-pity. You have begun
to feel the laws of compensation operating in all life.
3. You do not expect
special consideration from anyone.
4. You control your temper.
5. You
meet emergencies with poise.
6. You feelings are not easily hurt.
7. You
accept the responsibility of you own actions without trying to make excuses.
8. You have outgrown the "all or nothing" or "black & white" stage. You
recognize that no person or situation is wholly good or wholly bad, and you
begin to appreciate the Golden Mean.
9. You are not impatient at reasonable
delays. You have learned that you are not the arbiter of the universe and that
you must often adjust yourself to other people and their convenience.
10.
You are a good loser. You can endure defeat and disappointment without whining
or complaining.
11. You do not worry about things you cannot help.
12.
You are not given to boasting or "showing off" in socially unacceptable ways.
13. You are honestly glad when others enjoy success or good fortune. You
have outgrown envy and jealousy.
14. You are open-minded enough to listen
thoughtfully to the opinions of others.
15. You are not a chronic
"fault-finder."
16. You plan things in advance rather than trusting to the
inspiration of the moment.
(These were adapted from a brochure I found at my
friend's AA meeting)

Then his friend even get deeper into the mechanic of directing emotion:

Monday, September 27, 2004
Think Reasonable

A handful of people have asked me for the following information on how to correct negative thinking errors. I've used this method several times over the past six months or so. It works. I can't urge you strongly enough to do it. A few days ago I used this to deal with that depression I was talking about, and no kidding, I got instant relief!

After a triggering event:

Step one: Identify (from a list if necessary) what emotions you are experiencing.

Step two: List your automatic negative thoughts related to these emotions and the current situation.

Step three: Identify the negative urges/actions you have in response to the negative emotions or event. The list I have includes: withdraw, cutting down self or others, conflict w/others, threats or actual harm to self, threats or actual harm to others, physical fights, alcohol use, drug use.

Step four: Run your negative thoughts through the 'filter' of the checklist (below) and write down your rational (de-escalating) thoughts.

Step five: Take positive (de-escalating) action.


***


List of Thinking Errors

All or Nothing Thinking (also called black and white, polarized, or dichotomous thinking): You view a situation in only two categories instead of on a continuum.

Anticipating Negative Outcomes: You expect that something negative has happened or is going to happen. Two types of thinking errors fall into this category:


Fortune Telling: You predict that something negative is going to happen in the future, as if you were gazing into a crystal ball.

Catastrophizing: You tell yourself that the very worst is happening or is going to happen, without considering other possibilities that may be more likely and/or less negative.

Disqualifying or Discounting the Positive: You unreasonably tell yourself that positive experiences, deeds, or qualities do not count.

Emotional Reasoning: You think something must be true because you "feel" (actually believe) it so strongly, ignoring or discounting evidence to the contrary.

Labeling: You put a fixed, global label on yourself or others without considering that the evidence might more reasonably lead to a less disastrous conclusion.

Mental Filter (also called selective abstraction): You pay undue attention to one negative detail instead of seeing the whole picture.

Mind Reading: You believe you know what others are thinking, failing to consider other, more likely, possibilities, and you make no effort to check it out.

Overgeneralization: You make a sweeping negative conclusion that goes far beyond the current situation.

"Should" and "Must" Statements (also call imperatives): You have a precise, fixed idea of how you or others should behave and you overestimate how bad it is that these expectations are not met.

Maladaptive Thoughts: Problematic thoughts that do not contain logical thinking errors. These thoughts may be true. However, dwelling on them makes you feel more anxious and may interfere with your performance.


***


For Example:


I was sinking in a hole...depression!

My emotions: helpless, hopeless, inadequate, insecure, weak, paralyzed.

My auto-negative thoughts:

I didn't write these down, but they are reflected in the subsequent rational thoughts. Basically I felt horribly pessimistic upon awakening (for several days in a row) and could see no hope nor any way out.

My negative action/urge: withdraw (always!)

My rational (de-escalating) thoughts:

My day CAN'T be all bad, all gray, all meaningless. My feelings aren't the reality of the world. (knocking off all or nothing/black&white thinking)

My feelings COULD take a turn for the better--that is not an impossibility.

I COULD FEEL something positive in the course of the day. (knocks off fortune telling of the negative kind.)

Depression is serious and no fun, however it is not the worst thing that could happen. (knocks off catastrophizing.)

I DO get up every morning and go to work. That does count for something. (knocking off disqualifying, etc.)

What is the less disastrous conclusion? I'm struggling w/depression, sometimes I don't feel like fighting it--that does not make me a bad person. (knocking off labeling myself as bad.)

The neighbors may or may not, my family may or may not judge me for not working full time--for my 'easy' lifestyle. But they DO SEE that X and Y are good kids. They cannot deny that, and the kids and my depressions are the main reasons I choose not to work a full time job. (knocking off mind reading.)

I am depressed TODAY. That does not foretell or guarantee I will be depressed FOREVER. (knocks off overgeneralization.)

It is not the end of the world that I don't meet my own expectations. I will focus not on what is lacking, but on the little things I CAN do. (knocks off "should" and "must" statements.)

For me, just reviewing these statements is a positive (de-escalating) action.


This is a pretty basic example. Correcting my thoughts in this way helped me to feel better instantly. As I reminded myself of these truths throughout the day, my day seemed to get better and better. My classic response to that type depression is to believe that it is chemical, at least in part. I was surprised by how well this process worked. I don't think we're as bound by chemicals as we might think. (Just a thought.)

(Source: My shrink.)
posted by Laura 3:57 PM